The last blog post was about The Enneagram 2 (click HERE to go back and read it). 

This week focuses on Enneagram Three, The Performer.  Healthy Threes are movers and shakers who set goals but know how to balance work and rest.  They are comfortable in the spotlight but also in following someone else’s lead.  

Threes can do any kind of work, but if there are ladders to climb at work you can bet Threes are climbing them.  They are drawn to leadership and thrive in the spotlight.  Almost chameleon-like, Threes can read a room and be the version of themselves they need to be to find success there.  Put them in a group of executives and they’ve got the charisma and industry knowledge to mix and mingle.  With family they’ve got a different set of social skills and the same is true with a volunteer board, bowling league, or church group.  Threes tend to be good with people.

The deadly sin of Threes is deceit.  This doesn’t necessarily mean they lie to others but rather to themselves.  When they aren’t healthy, all of the image crafting and winning over others can leave Threes unsure about who they really are.  Threes can struggle with taking time for self-reflection.  They use the superpower of understanding others’ emotions to be successful in relationships but sometimes feel their own emotions get in the way of meeting goals.  My Threes as therapy clients learn to slow down and reflect on their own values and then set goals in alignment with these values.

Threes and Ones must be a good friendship combo because several of my closest friends are Threes.  Both personalities are driven and goal-oriented. A major difference I see between Ones and Threes is in cutting corners.  Ones will stress out if the bookshelf has extra screws at the end of building it while Threes mostly care that it’s done.  

There’s a competitive nature to Threes when they’re honest with themselves.  Years ago, a Three friend commented that they liked “being a big fish in a small pond” and I think this is a great example of a Three doing enough personal reflection to be able to recognize their competitive streak and even find humor in it. 

Some famous Threes are Taylor Swift, Jen Hatmaker, and probably a great many celebrities and politicians.  Capitalism and social media reward Three-ness.  The authors of The Road Back to You (available HERE) call the United States a Three Country, so I’m guessing there’s a little Three in all of us.